A pastor’s wife must be equally dedicated to the ministry. Without her support the pastor becomes vulnerable to many potential problems. Satan would like nothing more than to destroy the testimony of the pastor leading to havoc in the church. Without the support of his family many preachers have lost their ministry. Every preacher needs a faithful and dedicated help-meet as he serves in the local church. It is not necessary for the pastor’s wife to be an assistant pastor, but her heart’s desire must be in serving the Lord and standing behind her husband.
Even though a pastor’s wife is dedicated she can become discouraged in the ministry and be overcome with the pressures of the ministry. Pastoring a church is not easy and keeping a happy home is not easy but both must be given the proper amount of attention. Quality time must be spent with your wife and children. It is a key to balance the work of the church and time with family. Giving proper attention to both is possible if a serious effort is made to do so.
The demands of the church can be overwhelming and without the proper balance the church schedule can take precedence over your family. There are some activities that are not moveable in the church calendar but there is flexibility at other times. Those other times must be utilized and not ignored. Some simple things can be done to keep your marriage strong. A weekly date with your wife could be lunch at mid-day. It doesn’t have to be Saturday night. Periodically get away with your wife for an overnight. Take time away from the ministry every year for a vacation.
Don’t neglect the needs of your children. Growing up on the farm allowed me to spend a lot of time with my father. Most of it was working but not all. We had special times doing things like hunting and fishing or woodworking. Find out what your child enjoys and take an interest in them. Take your daughter or son to music lessons or attend their sports events. Taking the children with you when you run errands allows provides time with them and allows you to get things done. Doing things at church together with your family includes them in the ministry. The home should be a safe, secure, and happy place for your wife and children.
When you take some days off remember the church will still be there when you return. Every church has faithful people that will be in church and accomplish their ministry even when you are not there. Your family is important and if proper attention is not given to them, it could affect your testimony and the church.
God always come first, however neglecting your wife or children suggests you really don’t have the Lord in first place. If any man come to me, and hate not his father, and mother, and wife, and children, and brethren, and sisters, yea, and his own life also, he cannot be my disciple. — Luke 14:26. You cannot be married to the ministry. You are married to a wife and you have responsibilities that cannot be neglected. The role of the pastor’s wife is often without recognition. Please recognize the faithful service of your wife. She is essential to the work of the Lord.
Every young man considering entering the ministry must recognize that you must have a wife that has an equal burden to serve the Lord. Don’t settle for anything less. She will be your greatest supporter.